Monique's eulogy

I wrote this to read at the memorial but was too moved to get up and speak:

As many of you already know and what you will also notice in the slide show that I put together: Chris was not just a gifted artist and lover of music, but he was also a brother, a son, and a friend. Although he had created no family of his own, he was very much a family man. You could tell he liked being with his family and didn't make any distinction between close or distant relatives.

I was mulling over the word "brother" the other day, when thinking about Chris. Yes, he was my brother. But he wasn't just a brother through blood, but he was also a brother in the way some people use it to mean "very good friend." He was the type of man about whom you could say: "Chris is like a brother to me," because he would be there for you, he'd listen, he was someone whose opinion you valued, who impacted and influenced you for the better, and who wanted the best for you.

What I loved so much about Chris was that he would show such an interest in you and for that brief moment of togetherness be WITH you, 100%. He would devote all of his attention to you during that short span of time. Young at heart, often cheerful, always friendly, he really was the nicest man I've ever known. Even so, I think he was picky about who he became close friends with, so you could consider yourself lucky if you were chosen. But with almost everyone he was both compassionate and sympathetic.

If my mother were still here, she'd tell you her feelings for Chris, which ran deep. Although all three of her step sons were dear to her, I know that she held a special place in her heart for Chris. Chris was always invited to any get-togethers we had. Perhaps it was because he was single and could get away more easily, but I also think he liked being there and we liked having him.

When I first moved back to the States almost 20 years ago, Chris took me under his wing. He would come up to see me, driving about 75 miles up to Rifton, NY where I lived at the time. He started to sketch a portrait of me that he never finished but he came up several weekends in a row to work on it. He would often take me down to the City and we'd go see a band or check out the downtown pubs.

Even later, after I'd gotten settled in my life here, whenever the opportunity arose to either be in New York or to have a family gathering, Chris was a part of those experiences. I wish now that we could've had more of them. It's still hard to imagine we won't have those anymore.

Thanks, Chris, for being my brother. For being you.

~ Monique